Mitch McDad's World

Mitch gets some love from TIME

Fri, 15 Jul 2011 17:37:00 -0400

Love Means Cleaning Up The Chucks

Sat, 05 Jun 2010 14:22:00 -0400

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude,...

The 40 Year Old Virgin

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:32:00 -0400

I turned 40 this past summer: a formidable milestone in many ways, a time to say goodbye to...

Just because I like to make dudes cringe...

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:30:00 -0400

Ok. My new best friend, Harmonica Man, one upped my vasectomy post by so cruelly describing how he...

"How 'bout a couple extra stitches, Doc?" A Mother's Day post?????

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:26:00 -0400

At the risk at attracting even more blog hits from nasty Google searches, here we go. During a...

PMS is your friend...A pregnacy guide.

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:23:00 -0400

Lamaze: do I really need to do this? Let me start by saying that during our first pregnancy, MRS and...

Snip Tuck

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:19:27 -0400

After Lulu came along, and I could see 40 lurking not-so-discreetly around the corner, MRS and I...

Easy Riders I’m curious. When did it become necessary to don...

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 14:10:18 -0400

Easy Riders

I’m curious. When did it become necessary to don bike leotards to ride a bike? Where was that line of demarcation drawn? I’ve been riding a bike all my life and not once have I ever thought, “boy this T-shirt is really slowing me down.”

OK. If you’re a world-class athlete named Lance or Floyd: go ahead, knock yourself out. You can wear body latex for all I care. Even you hard-core amateurs riding thousands of miles a weekend: have at it. But for the rest of you leg-shavers, come on, take a peek in the mirror. You look like a bunch of douche bags. And what’s with the leg shaving, anyway? I know…I know…just preventing “road rash,” right? Well, I’m not buying that for a second. Unless your Schwinn ten-speed happens upon some X-Games track and you catch some unexpected “air,” I’m pretty sure you’re just shaving for the fun of it. And hey, I’m not judging, just calling it what it is. You dig shaving your legs. Embrace it.

So my neighbor, 50’s, skinny legs, no ass, fat gut, saggy man-boobs, emerges from his garage today in full neon-yellow bike leotards. Apparently he needs to shave a few hundredths off his time on that ride to the park and back. Look, when you go swimming, do you slap on a Speedo? Of course not. Even if I’m going to swim a few laps to get the heart pumping, I’m still wearing board shorts to do it. Just as when I hop on my bike for an hour or so I’m wearing cargo shorts and my “Who Farted” T-shirt. I know we all like to “gear up” for our favorite activities these days, but please, someone needs to enact some basic standards. Let’s let our collective consciences guide us.

Another favorite of mine are the little gangs of leg-shavers that feel the need to gather at a coffee shop after the big ride. Sweaty, legs glistening, they plop their space helmets on the tables, click-clack around on their little pedal-cleats, while blinding innocent people-watchers with their peacock-like costumes that if any tighter would let you know if they were circumcised or not. It’s enough already.

Maybe we can start some form of grassroots campaign to buy these “athletes” stationary bikes, thus allowing them to “train” in the privacy of their own homes, wearing pantyhose and leg-warmers for all I care. Let’s get ‘em off the streets, people.

On that note, I’m off to hop in the pool. Now, where’s that Speedo?

The Creepy Aspect Of Writing A Parenting Blog Back when I...

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 13:45:33 -0400

The Creepy Aspect Of Writing A Parenting Blog

Back when I started this blog in 2006 my kids played a prominent role and that role has diminished as time has progressed. Now that they are 4 and 6, I feel like I’d be impinging on their personal space if I wrote in more than general terms about them. As babies, it really doesn’t matter—they all do the same stuff essentially.

What really disturbed me and precipitated the removal of their photographs was the time when I followed a referral link to my blog that lead me to a creepy adult man in wearing a diaper. That was enough for me. Plus, with the grown-up content I write about comes a flood of nasty search engine terms generating blog traffic. Write one post with “penis” in the title (as I did) and it’s all over. Every perve with electricity will be stopping by at some point.

So I don’t right about my kids much anymore (except in very general terms). My other problem is that after nearly 3 years on this blog (granted, the last year I was sporadically active at best) I’ve become bored shitless of parenting—as a subject, not a role in my life. Let’s face it, the topic has been covered pretty extensively. There are a lot of smart, funny posts out there that are well worth reading and I still do when I have time, but I’ve got very little left to say about parenting and a shitload more to say about everything else.

Diaper-man probably did me a favor in curtailing my kid exposure on the blog because there are to too many nasty creatures with Internet access doing nasty things in dark rooms and …. you get the point. It’s too gross to elaborate on.

My blog always had a little edge to it. I suspect that will only get worse, or better depending upon your point of view. Anyone with a sense of humor and a little perspective should be just fine.